eeeeeeeeeeeee packing *hides*

i think that i am developing some sort of plath obession. and i don't know why. ehh. *smile**breaks the plath**inserts bnl*testing 1,2,3Better than the first timeBetter than the worst timeIf I could just reverse timeI'd be setTesting 1,2,3Can anybody hear me?If I shed the ironyWould anybody cheer me?If I acted less like meWould I be in the clear?She got a new apartmentIt's out on the escarpmentAnd in her glove compartmentAre my songsKind of like the last timeWith a bunch of really fast timesIf we're living in the past timeSoon goneWe recognize the presentIs half as pleasantAs our nostalgia forThe past'll be presentedRecast and reinventedUntil it's how we meant it

plath.

*yawns*bah packing. Love Is A Parallax'Perspective betrays with its dichotomy:train tracks always meet, not here, but only in the impossible mind's eye;horizons beat a retreat as we embarkon sophist seas to overtake that mark where wave pretends to drench real sky.' 'Well then, if we agree, it is not oddthat one man's devil is another's god or that the solar spectrum isa multitude of shaded grays; suspenseon the quicksands of ambivalence is our life's whole nemesis. So we could rave on, darling, you and I,until the stars tick out a lullaby about each cosmic pro and con;nothing changes, for all the blazing ofour drastic jargon, but clock hands that move implacably from twelve to one. We raise our arguments like sitting ducksto knock them down with logic or with luck and contradict ourselves for fun;the waitress holds our coats and we put onthe raw wind like a scarf; love is a faun who insists his playmates run. Now you, my intellectual leprechaun,would have me swallow the entire sun like an enormous oyster, downthe ocean in one gulp: you say a markof comet hara-kiri through the dark should inflame the sleeping town. So kiss: the drunks upon the curb and damesin dubious doorways forget their monday names, caper with candles in their heads;the leaves applaud, and santa claus flies inscattering candy from a zeppelin, playing his prodigal charades. The moon leans down to took; the tilting fishin the rare river wink and laugh; we lavish blessings right and left and cryhello, and then hello again in deafchurchyard ears until the starlit stiff graves all carol in reply. Now kiss again: till our strict father leansto call for curtain on our thousand scenes; brazen actors mock at him,multiply pink harlequins and singin gay ventriloquy from wing to wing while footlights flare and houselights dim. Tell now, we taunq where black or white beginsand separate the flutes from violins: the algebra of absolutesexplodes in a kaleidoscope of shapesthat jar, while each polemic jackanapes joins his enemies' recruits. The paradox is that 'the play's the thing':though prima donna pouts and critic stings, there burns throughout the line of words,the cultivated act, a fierce brief fusionwhich dreamers call real, and realists, illusion: an insight like the flight of birds: Arrows that lacerate the sky, while knowingthe secret of their ecstasy's in going; some day, moving, one will drop,and, dropping, die, to trace a wound that healsonly to reopen as flesh congeals: cycling phoenix never stops. So we shall walk barefoot on walnut shellsof withered worlds, and stamp out puny hells and heavens till the spirits squeaksurrender: to build our bed as high as jack'sbold beanstalk; lie and love till sharp scythe hacks away our rationed days and weeks. Then jet the blue tent topple, stars rain down,and god or void appall us till we drown in our own tears: today we startto pay the piper with each breath, yet loveknows not of death nor calculus above the simple sum of heart plus heart.

insomniac by plath

The night is only a sort of carbon paper,Blueblack, with the much-poked periods of starsLetting in the light, peephole after peephole --A bonewhite light, like death, behind all things.Under the eyes of the stars and the moon's rictusHe suffers his desert pillow, sleeplessnessStretching its fine, irritating sand in all directions.Over and over the old, granular movieExposes embarrassments--the mizzling daysOf childhood and adolescence, sticky with dreams,Parental faces on tall stalks, alternately stern and tearful,A garden of buggy rose that made him cry.His forehead is bumpy as a sack of rocks.Memories jostle each other for face-room like obsolete film stars.He is immune to pills: red, purple, blue --How they lit the tedium of the protracted evening!Those sugary planets whose influence won for himA life baptized in no-life for a while,And the sweet, drugged waking of a forgetful baby.Now the pills are worn-out and silly, like classical gods.Their poppy-sleepy colors do him no good.His head is a little interior of grey mirrors.Each gesture flees immediately down an alleyOf diminishing perspectives, and its significanceDrains like water out the hole at the far end.He lives without privacy in a lidless room,The bald slots of his eyes stiffened wide-openOn the incessant heat-lightning flicker of situations.Nightlong, in the granite yard, invisible catsHave been howling like women, or damaged instruments.Already he can feel daylight, his white disease,Creeping up with her hatful of trivial repetitions.The city is a map of cheerful twitters now,And everywhere people, eyes mica-silver and blank,Are riding to work in rows, as if recently brainwashed.

*...

*text was here, then removed*

camp sched.

Staff Training: May 22-31June 1 OFFSession 1: June 2-5 (4 day)Session 2: June 6-12 (7 Day)Session 3: June 13-19 (7 Day)June 20,21,22 OFFSession 4: June 23 - July 2 (10 Day)July 3,4,5,6 OFFSession 5: July 7-10 (4 Day)Session 6: July 11-17 (7 Day)July 18,19,20 OFFSession 7: July 21-24 (CORE CAMP ROCKS! 4 Day)Session 8: July 25-31 (7 Day)Clean-Up: August 1

survey.

an anon survey...

...randomlunchquote...

'sometimes i think that the old stuff eats the new stuff'

marriage! wedding! october 16th!

Ok so the wedding that I am a bridesmaid in is not next june it's this October! Gillette's wedding. Oh my wedding. Eeep... so I have to decide what I want to wear. As long as it's apple and from the mix and match part of david's bridal (they're separates) I'm good... here's some of the millions o' choices I have.
.... click to seeeeee them ~_^
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let me know what you all think and which one's you like... *yanws* or feel free to go to www.davidsbridal.com and mix one for me. :)

miranda likes: the 4th one. but i like them all cause i posted them here.

-m

yum

the newspaper, reeses cups, and a warm blanket for a chilled miranda. the refreshing rain was cold.

was in the senior dance concert peice that i thought was cool.

we emerged from youth all wide-eyed like the rest. shedding skin faster than skin can grow, and armed with hammers, feathers, blunt knives: words, to meet and to define and to... but you must know the same games that we played in dirt, in dusty school yards has found a higher pitch and broader scale than we feared possible, and someone must be picked last, and one must bruise and one must fail. and that still twitching bird was so deceived by a window, so we eulogized fondly, we dug deep and threw its elegant plumage and frantic black eyes in a hole, and rushed out to kill something new, so we could bury that too. the first chapters of lives almost made us give up altogether. pushed towards tired forms of self immolation that seemed so original. i must, we must never stop watching the sky with our hands in our pockets, stop peering in windows when we know doors are shut. stop yelling small stories and bad jokes and sorrows, and my voice will scratch to yell many more, but before i spill the things i mean to hide away, or gouge my eyes with platitudes of sentiment, i'll drown the urge for permanence and certainty; crouch down and scrawl my name with yours on wet cement. -sounds familiar-by weakerthans off of fallow

meh.

the tv is obnoxiously loud.my head is pounding.i wish i had an animal to snuggle next to.the rommmate is in here with her mantoy.exams are hella close.my ear plugs are nowhere to be found.i so need to clean,got advising code, yet now need gumption to find classes.must reregister for housing for the fall.need to pay off library overdue fine.it looks like i misplaced the incubus cd i was to sent someone.i left my ace bandage in guilford... and wrist is pissed.my roommate is snuggled next to her bf. >_<i sent drunken ims last night.i want to snuggled next to a friend and can't.closer to moving back home.going to snap soon and start killing.keep reading things into/adding on to what people say. my fave g'rents think that there is something wrong with me.the alcohol is insanely low. sad.i need to wash my hair... it smells.life has coerced me into being tired of it once again.i am restless.the full moon is near.the desk where i am sitting just moved... thus I have finally cracked.the air is cold.it's beein 2 days since i last masturbated.there's a choral funtime tomorrow that I need to remember to get the comp ticket to.if i dyed my hair pink it has been said that i would look like a cupcake.i need hair dye pronto.yawns are addictive.my god the roommate snores.my toe nails are black.fingernails are non existant.snuggling is the greatest thing on earth.ah! i just realized that my elbow pits are hella ticklish today.i miss things/people/the way things were... nostalgia, jah.i feel like arguing with people for the hell of it.i'm hungry again.they're cute in each others arms.looks cut deeper than words... no words be needed.i have two rolls of film to develop.a friend requested of me to me make a pic i posted of her dancing private- fingertips might be sliced if i failed to comply to a suggestion.i want to shove socks in my rommates nose cause the noise would then be less.i'm sporting scrub pants.love love love.the airconditioner has got to go.fingertips c/o Poe.fingerprints c/o skott freedman.i sleep next to my phone... that never rings while i am asleep but it doesn't matter. it's closer so that I can reset the alarm when it sounds.just scratched my ankle.families are off bunches of ppls.cheese is a god.i made some rock out noddles.bed calls, peace...earplugs located beside bed.[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<ed.>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]the tv is obnoxiously loud.my head is pounding.i wish i had an animal to snuggle next to.the rommmate is in here with her mantoy.exams are hella close.my ear plugs are nowhere to be found.i so need to clean,got advising code, yet now need gumption to find classes.must reregister for housing for the fall.need to pay off library overdue fine.it looks like i misplaced the incubus cd i was to sent someone.i left my ace bandage in guilford... and wrist is pissed.my roommate is snuggled next to her bf. >_<i sent drunken ims last night.i want to snuggled next to a friend and can't.closer to moving back home.going to snap soon and start killing.keep reading things into/adding on to what people say. my fave g'rents think that there is something wrong with me.the alcohol is insanely low. sad.i need to wash my hair... it smells.life has coerced me into being tired of it once again.i am restless.the full moon is near.the desk where i am sitting just moved... thus I have finally cracked.the air is cold.it's beein 2 days since i last masturbated.there's a choral funtime tomorrow that I need to remember to get the comp ticket to.if i dyed my hair pink it has been said that i would look like a cupcake.i need hair dye pronto.yawns are addictive.my god the roommate snores.my toe nails are black.fingernails are non existant.snuggling is the greatest thing on earth.ah! i just realized that my elbow pits are hella ticklish today.i miss things/people/the way things were... nostalgia, jah.i feel like arguing with people for the hell of it.i'm hungry again.they're cute in each others arms.looks cut deeper than words... no words be needed.i have two rolls of film to develop.a friend requested of me to me make a pic i posted of her dancing private- fingertips might be sliced if i failed to comply to a suggestion.i want to shove socks in my rommates nose cause the noise would then be less.i'm sporting scrub pants.love love love.the airconditioner has got to go.fingertips c/o Poe.fingerprints c/o skott freedman.i sleep next to my phone... that never rings while i am asleep but it doesn't matter. it's closer so that I can reset the alarm when it sounds.just scratched my ankle.families are off bunches of ppls.cheese is a god.i made some rock out noddles.bed calls, peace...earplugs located beside bed.<ed. for spelling, etc>

marcy playground lyrics

Our Generation Are you a child of the free to be you and me generationAnd are you in tune with the world around youI am a child of the free to be you and me generationAnd I am with you in being in tuneWe shall bring change to this placeListen to the whistle of the planet twirlin' through spaceSingin la la la la la la to the human race(She says)I believe I am the flower of life, the EarthAnd the ocean oh ohI believe I feel the power of light, vibrateAll around me oh ohI believe you are the children of the one Great Spirit, oh ohAre you a child of the free to be you and me generationAnd are you confused with the world around youI am a child of the free to be you and me generationAnd I am with you in being confusedChildren children can you hear itListen to the riddle in the melody by Great SpiritSingin' la la la la la la there's nothin' to it(He says)I believe I am the flower of life, the airAnd the sunshine oh ohI believe I am the power of light, the motiveFor the universe oh ohI believe you are the children of the oneMother Earth oh oh